We are back now, but while I was in New England, my parents went to Real England and my brother left for his job at camp. I will have the house to myself for ten days and so, after I said goodbye to my two dear friends, the thought crossed my mind -
i am more alone than i've ever been.
Not even in a sad way, really. Alone and lonely are not the same thing. Just, the fact of the matter is, I've never lived alone for so long without a friend or boyfriend constantly available. I've especially never lived alone with 100% unstructured free time - there are things to be done, but no schedules or deadlines.
So far (as in, for the past 36 hours) being totally unattached, uncommitted, unlooked-for, is as freeing as you'd imagine. I thought about continuing my travels on to North Carolina or Argentina without telling anyone, just because I could.
(maybe... after I do my laundry).
I settled, mid-return-journey, on just going hiking.
So I did...
And I walked across this log on a dare from myself, and no one had to worry about me...
On the drive home I explored a couple of the places I've always wanted to stop at, but never had the time for. This abandoned house was locked:
...Although it was somewhat protected by a very scary gravel road between that sign and the chapel to which it points. This is quite literally the entire building; I was standing in the doorway, about three feet behind that last pew.
All these photos and blather to say, so far I've demonstrated that left to my own devices, I go exploring. I also:
- talk to myself
- turn my computer on and off many times a day
- do lots of things at once
- am fairly responsible (so far)
- introspect like it's a legitimate hobby
Which is what this post was meant to be about - all those great thoughts- but it seems to have turned into a captain's log. Wind NNW at 3 knots, hope to sight whale on the morrow...
Thoughts to come.